Price of Sex - Free Self defence in Mumbai

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Just going through Twitter highlights made me land here.


It is nerve whacking. Because whether we accept it or not, (and accepting does take a great deal of courage), every woman's deepest darkest nightmare is human sex trafficking.

Wiki link

The courage this woman
had to actually pose as a prostitute and film so many real women and their real lives sends a chill down the spine. You don't want to imagine what could have been. We forget our blessings. So often! It is so easy to rant. About a crappy job, about parents or in-laws who don't understand you. About children getting out of control. About that date who hasn't called back. Or the lack of it.

Oh, but pause, breathe and take a second. Yes, that very life no one wants to hear about. We know it exists. And we constantly deny. We deny it when we want to roam free like a bird at night. We deny because everyone wants to feel safe. Mumbaikars keep telling themselves, 'It's not Delhi'.

Comprehensive 19 min PRICE OF SEX

We strive for equality. We jump for women's rights. We ask why the men won't change their attitude of considering women just as cattle or cargo, a piece of flesh to be traded and used and reused and thrown off after? This industry strives on profit, said Price of Sex. When the women cut themselves a lot they are sent to brothels where they like scarred products. Wait. What? Who likes scarred, disturbed tortured girls? 

What kind of kinky crazy psychopathic sexual fantasy could include fucking women locked up in closed rooms without a window, without showers, without food or water, where the earlier semen hasn't been washed off? Wait. Maybe that's sperm of 50*5 days we are talking about. How do these men get an erection? What level of dark world do they belong?

Prostitution is legal in Turkey. But forced prostitution? And wait, that's because women are not allowed to have sex before marriage. Men are? Obviously!

"She unbuttoned her shirt and asked me to photograph her. 'They used me as an ashtray', she said."
30 men a day. Few bananas. 3 women locked in a room.

A nice short song by MTV Killers

Long time ago,the MTV Killers video had really impacted me and I'd tried to spread the word. That is a case where very wealthy men could be trapped. Oh, she looks hot. Rich. Happy. She looks damn happy to be doing this job. Maybe it's about just another profession? She's happy and I'm paying her. What's wrong with it? I booked a five star.

It's not always about Secret Diaries of a London Call girl. You never know who is actually paying the price for your sex.

The way that song video captures the change of perspectives where the same hot seemingly happy smooch changes and changes as every layer of a moment before this moment is unravelled in front of our eyes is shocking. If you didn't know anything about the video, you didn't imagine it coming. 

The good guy being the rapist

Life is layered. It's never unidimensional. There are so many aspects. While we struggle to convey that a woman flirting with you doesn't mean consent, even well educated men amongst us fail to understand the thin line between consensual and forcing themselves on someone. They feel a strong need to lead. I don't understand why. Why would a girl keep saying no if she wanted it?

Lack of consequences and change in attitude leads to crime against women

Would you expect an uneducated man, who is not raised better to understand? Especially with the lack of consequences? I've always loved the way Nitin Gupta, IIT comedian puts it.

Pick any female politician of your choice. Make her as drunk as possible. Make her wear the shortest clothes. Majaal hai kuchh hoga?
It is always the lack of consequences.

Free women self defence centre, Mumbai

Though rape laws have toughened, sitting back quiet doesn't help. I'd love to jump to catch a bus, tie my hair up and move my head in the night air to my favourite dance number banging in my ears. But my self defence trainer would say that is being over confident on the street.

Yes, coming back to the promise I'd made years ago, I've dragged my ass from Colaba to Andheri. Yes, it is Akshay Kumar's insitute that we had been hearing of everywhere. So, it's just about one and a half hour Saturday and Sunday. Absolutely free. Drag your ass to Andheri Sports Complex. It's first thing on left when you get out of Exit Gate 2 of Metro station Azad Nagar.

Things you need:

  • A photograph 
  • A protruding false key out of a plastic back, like a car key 
  • a whistle
  • a pen to sign the form
When you get it for free, I won't understand why any woman in Mumbai won't be here?

Who takes self defence seriously?

Now, I'll tell you a funny and sadly also a real story.
There are many little girls along with us, both in my batch and in the evening batch after me. While walking up in the metro, I met this little one from my batch. Casually asking where we are coming from, her father exclaimed, 'From Colaba? You came all the way to Andheri for this? You came just for this? You are taking it seriously!', he was warmly surprised.

And I (as you know) said, ' What's the point of taking a self defence course if you don't take it seriously?'

No, I'm puzzled. Can anyone answer me?

The father who waited from 1.30 to 4 in the heat, (due to a slight extension), to take his kid back didn't take self defence seriously?

So, is it a child's play? Ofcourse, it's not. I'm scared if I can do it. Simple kicks to the black belts. Lack of stamina for us, mango people. My heels sore as hell as I can't walk, afraid to fail after 4 weeks and 8 sessions, wondering if I'll pass and get the certificate from Akshay Kumar, I wonder if the paper certificate is what the father was looking for.

She's a cute kid. I'd get shit scared if I'd a small daughter in this extremely intolerant India today. It's not always about rape, though we never lack pedophiles. But haven't you seen the kids begging at traffic signals? I'm a very positive person. My usual way of being positive is shutting My self from every newspaper and news that there is. No crime patrol either. But even with absolute lack of G.K. and probably the one to be crowned Ms. Unaware, even I understand how important it is to teach the kid to take the class seriously.

It's always good to know how to protect oneself from chain snatchers to thieves to rapists or kidnappers. Self defence is not Activity or Game period. It's not just another class you added to your child's schedule. 
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